The other day I came across this quote by Italian prime minister, Silvio Berlusconi:
I’ve never understood what satisfaction there is other than that of conquering (a woman).
Ladies beware! This man’s penchant for philandering is no longer a matter of speculation.
Creepiness aside, we can at least give him credit for being honest. Most men, though they might never admit it, probably have held to the same belief as Mr. Berlusconi during at least one phase of their lives—many grow out of it, however, after graduating from high school or college. The universality of the PM’s conviction is attested to by the fact that, whether in a locker room, a frat house, or a car on the way to a rock concert, male conversation often turns to “war stories”, accounts of the number of women vanquished, the strategies used in combat, and the details of the battle’s consummation.
And its ubiquitousness is unequivocally confirmed and reinforced by the entertainment industry. Most notably in the countless rap songs that self-exultantly wax eloquent on the rapper’s sexual prowess and virtual limitless successes. But it is also seen in the multitude of movies that glorify the ladies’ man, who effortlessly has his way with whomever he wishes. The epitome of these, of course, is James Bond. The reason Hollywood is still cashing in on the Bond franchise after 45 years is due, in part, to this seemingly innate conviction that men are forced to reckon with.
Interestingly, men are not the only ones who must fight the notion that true and lasting satisfaction is only found in the subjugation of the opposite sex. According to Proverbs 6:23-26, women can be guilty of the same.
For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching is light; and reproofs for discipline are the way of life to keep you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the adulteress. Do not desire her beauty in your heart, nor let her capture you with her eyelids. For on account of a harlot one is reduced to a loaf of bread, and an adulteress hunts for the precious life.
Two key words in this passage are capture and hunt. They paint the adulteress as a predator and her victim as the prey. We see this even more clearly in Proverbs 7:21-23.
With her many persuasions she entices him; with her flattering lips she seduces him. Suddenly he follows her as an ox goes to the slaughter, or as one in fetters to the discipline of a fool, until an arrow pierces through his liver; as a bird hastens to the snare, so he does not know that it will cost him his life.
Whether male or female, one who seeks satisfaction in sexual conquest is like an obsessed hunter (a Captain Ahab), who’s ambition is the victorious exertion of his power (physical, intellectual, spiritual) over another. However, experience and reason (and revelation) show us that the thrill of sexual conquest is short-lived, usually ending in greater emptiness, and worse, is stained by a trail of bleeding and broken victims who will haunt the hunter’s conscience until he dies.
Psalm 16:11 says (of God),
In Your presence is fullness of joy; in Your right hand there are pleasures forever.
This means that true and lasting satisfaction can only be found in God (for only an eternal being can provide pleasures forever). Whatever conquest we are seeking—sexual, business, artistic, athletic, social, etc.—will never be able to completely and lastingly fill us with the fullness of joy we long for. Only when we’ve left off seeking to establish our own kingdoms and begin seeking first His kingdom, laying down our arms and allowing Him to conquer our hearts, will we find the love, joy, and peace—the satisfaction—that has always eluded us.
